My (Hel)LSAT Experience

I spent the entirety of Saturday morning in a cocoon of quiet chaos. Saturday morning I took my first practice LSAT ever. As in, I haven't even looked at a real section of the test before. I knew that it was supposed to be a difficult thing to do, but I've been able to conquer a number of difficult things in the past. I figured: "Hey, I'm a smart guy. I can keep a good GPA. The LSAT is a fear only to lesser mortals."

I wish I could describe to you the horror that I felt about 50 minutes into the test when I realized that I had no idea what I was doing. My entire framework of confidence and perceived ability crashed around me, not so much like a house of cards as a house of African Elephants. On a foundation of mines. I was completely taken by surprise by the difficulty of the exam, and I was dismayed at my obvious lack of preparation.

Dismayed is a poor choice of words. In fact, I would call it hyperbole. I suppose horrified is a better word, or maybe aghast or thunderstruck.

In all truth, I think the best adjective to describe my experience with the LSAT is humiliating. I was severely humbled and innerly embarrassed by my presumptuous approach to the exam and its level of difficulty. This is not an easy test. Granted, it isn't impossible either, but I am not of the caliber of scholar to waltz into the exam room and polka out of it with top marks. I know there are some people that can and have done that; I, however, am not of that crowd.

BUT - do not think that this means that I will cower before the might that is the LSAT. I've only just begun, and now that I know my enemy I know how to defeat it. This test has not seen the last of me, no siree. I will make this test rue the day it ever set its beady little scanner on my social security number. And when the time comes when I shall poke it in its sleeping eye for real, only one of us will leave the exam room triumphant.

And on that future day - that bright, beautiful, future day - I will emerge from the bowels of hell bloody, but unbowed.